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Being a Father in Britain.


          It is quite different to be a father in Britain than in India. Being a father in Britain to-day isn’t what it used to be few years before. To day the duty of the father does not fulfill by bringing home the bacon. Surely it means much more than that.

To-day fathers are under pressure to juggle career and family. For majority of the fathers to-day, it has become important for them to take part in raising their children as providing expenses for them.

There seems to be a social revolution in father-hood by the commencement of Father’s Day and now bonafide fathers seem to take more interest in the day to day care of the up bringing of their children rather than spending their extra time in pubs and other public places. Surprisingly many of such father or to be fathers are seen attending antenatal scans, National Child Birth Trust Groups and are seen taking time off work during the last hours of their child birth and they are not doing just because they are compelled to do so but they are doing so because they want to…

I have recently, during my long visit to England noted that British fathers to-day are spending more time than ever with their kids, on average of an hour or more compared to few minutes which I observed in my earlier trips of eighties and nineties.

It seems as if now the age of being super Dad has come as I have seen Dads managing school runs, attending PTA meetings, taking care of the dress and food of the kids instead of going for more time to their career.

I have very deeply noted and observed that although Men care out to be better fathers , career still comes first to them. They don’t want to be told by their colleagues or they don’t wish their friends to think that there is something wrong with them if family affairs get in the way.

The fathers in England still work the longest hours in Europe, more than mothers. They work up to 60 hours a week compared to an average of 40 hours a week for women. What is more, I have seen recently is that according to the Government figures only 5% of the new fathers will take up the proposed extended paternity leave. Given that the pay is well below the minimum wage, many of them simply can’t afford to…

Fathers of to-day do not even want to ask for more flexible arrangements. The pressure to keep on top of work and the need for special allowances is relentless.

Women have fought this issue for decades. The truth is, most men still duck it, if they care at all men wish to be good fathers and I am very much sure almost every one means it, but it’s still pretty much socially unacceptable to do anything about it and likely to be at the cost of the career.

It is for the first time in Britain, I have seen for once that both mothers and fathers are going in the same direction with same motives with similar aims and the pressure that have been on mothers in general for long are now creeping up on fathers.

It is really sad to learn that the children in Britain compared with the developed countries are the un-happiest children and also the most badly behaved.  It is also the truth that cases of juvenile crimes in Great Britain are on the foremost record. British children in general are so spoiled that they never feel ashamed to insult the teacher at school and elders at home. And many of them behave very nastily in the public places to the extent of fist fights and even murders. It is entirely the make out of the British parents as they are unable to balance their responsibility towards their career and their children.

I very well understand how difficult it becomes for a good father to build his perfect career. Super stressed father is not good for any one especially for children.

It is high time if more working fathers start to insert on a more flexible work-place, or choose a different job that delivers the chances and time to spend after their children. Perhaps the message will start to get through the Government and the employers.

So far mothers have fought it alone. Now it would be parents as a whole to go for it. And surely their dreams of their children to be well behaved at school and at home and even at the public places would come true.  Not only that but their better out put, right skills and the leadership within them will come out at all sectors and they will surely build a more developed, civilized and well behaved strong Nation.

And Father’s Day, Mother’s Day and Children’s Day would turn out to be National Holidays to the surprise of the other world. Perhaps Great Britain would turn out to be the setting example for the rest of the world to divert the young generation to the right tune.




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